As I mentioned in my Vegas article,
Eric,
of Squishy fame, mentioned that he
wanted to deep fry a hamburger. Not just the patty, but the entire thing,
bun, fixings, and all.
Now, I didn't think that it would work. But in the interest of science
and to serve the needs of all mankind, it had to be tested. All of this
was done without Eric's consultation nor permission, so let's hope that he
doesn't decide to sue.
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| The Burger Masters. From left
to right: Roy, Fred, P-Funk, Ripper. |
We decided to conduct the experiment at the MonkeyBOX research laboratories
on superbowl Sunday. This isn't the first time the MonkeyBOX staff has been
asked to solve such questions. After a few beers, we're all about exploring
the nature of the universe (see What happens when you boil a can of beer?
and Can a hammer be thrown completely through drywall?).
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| The Ingredients. |
Anyhow, we decided to start simple and cheap. We used basic cheeseburgers
from Get 'em and Go, since they're cheap and compact. I had them leave
the ketchup off, since I'm disgusted by its presence. I hope this didn't
adversely affect the results. We tried two types of batter: A simple beer
batter that I was making anyway for the pickles later, and an eggwash/bread
crumb deal that I expected would have better results. (recipes available
upon request.)
Batters were prepared. Burgers were dipped. Theories were espoused.
Originally, most of us thought that the burgers would fall apart. Due to
the cheapness of the selected burgers, however, there was no danger of this
happening (though, as an example of my preparedness, I did have toothpicks
on-hand to solve this particular problem). Most believed that the bun
would work as a sponge and soak up all the grease. None of us expected that they would come out.
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Fred battered the first burger. |
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It came out a beautiful golden brown. |
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Mmm... Yummy, baity goodness. |
P-Funk and
Ripper were the first ones to
sample the creation. Now, some of the readers aren't going to believe
this, but they loved them. Some of the comments that were uttered
that day include, "You've ruined me for fast food burgers", "Next time I go
to McDonald's can I stop by your house to deep fry them?", and "Fred, you
are the most attractive, funny, and intelligent person I've ever met." Well,
I think that last one was said. People were certainly thinking it, anyhow.
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Really, they liked it! |
Next... the eggwash...
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